Monday, April 30, 2007

Two minutes to share a lifetime of love

My mom is one of six ladies who will be receiving an award from Avon as their tribute to Mothers who have helped shape the nation. The event is on Thursday 3rd May, with our new Queen as the guest of honour.

As part of their programme, Avon wants the children of these six ladies to give a two minute tribute on stage about their mom. So of course, my mom asked me to do it. (My brother Mike has a tendency to tell his fishing jokes and once he even broke out in a Hindi song!)

So panic, panic... as usual, I have been doing my best not to think about it (cannot afford to be stuck in 'mm'). But the rehearsal is on Wed - that's day after tomorrow!!!

It's not the stage fright that is scary - it is that I only have two minutes. How can I possibly squeeze in everything that I feel about Mom in such a short time? What if I leave something out? What if I fall short of the task and my tribute doesn't live up to the glory of my Mom?

It's funny how life turns out, isn't it? I spend my life in advertising, trained to squeeze compelling selling messages into just 30 secs. Compared to that, 120 secs should seem long. But it isn't.

One night we were on the way home from dinner, and it happened that it was just Mom and me in the car. Out of the blue, she turned to me and said "You know, you're so good to me now, but I think I've neglected you when you were a child. I was always so busy. I was hardly ever at home." That took me totally by surprise! I felt so warm, so touched.

She doesn't usually say things like this. Whenever I get mushy with her and tell her how much I love her, she always says "Aiya, I don't know how to say things like that." So for her to say this was a complete surprise. And I've been thinking that I don't spend enough time with her.

Anyway, I squeezed her hand, and suddenly, there was a movie playing in my head - a movie of my childhood memories with mom. As each sweet memory came up, I described it to her. She couldn't remember much but it didn't matter. The feeling that came with each memory just radiated out from both our hearts and filled the car. It was like we were in one happy bubble - pity the car ride had to end.

My relationship with my Mom has been rocky over the years. When I was much younger, I used to blame her for every inadequacy I had. Yup, I was a complete victim of 'my Mom didn't bring me up properly'. Aaw, poor little me... hahahaha!

Well, I got over that a long time ago when I moved into my guilty phase : "Mom has been so great and I never loved her enough, I haven't done enough for her, I'm taking her for granted, and so on..."

I've only recently got over that. I got over being stuck in my beliefs and focussed on just being present with her. And now, our relationship is the sweetest it has ever been. Thanks to Bisma, I woke up to how important it is to be present and fully appreciate each and every moment.

So I am glad that I have this opportunity now. And I think that's why I woke up at 4.45am, fresh and unable to go back to sleep. I've been lying in bed trying to figure out what to say. Think I have something in mind now - something risky but something that is important to my family, and it is something that only I am daring enough to do.

I'm not going to share it yet, still need to think it through first before I start writing the words. I always say this to our participants : crystalise your intention and your message first. Then the words will flow.

Since I started 95%, it seems that I get thrown a bigger challenge each year. Last year, it was being MC at Kancil Awards. The year before it was a letter for my brother. Now, it's Mom.

It always comes to this : If I had a platform to speak and be heard, what would I say?

What would YOU say?

Imagine if you had this one chance to say something about YOUR mom, what would you say? Think about it - and I challenge you to find a way to actually deliver it in front of her.

Ok, time for my second cup of coffee. Hope you have a blessed week ahead, and may your mom receive lots of love and blessings too :)


Blogger jingwei said...

I think in hindsight, I was always sort of mean to MY mom. She was as moms go, all the nagging and worrying and humdrums that she throws. Ever since I was away from home to study I have sort of resented the phone calls that she makes almost everyday. Even now I find her to be saliva more than tea.

But as time went on I guess it's sort of improved, I try to make the most out of family time whenever I get some, because I know as days go by it's going to get harder and harder to do so.

I remember some time ago my mother said to me suddenly - you know sometimes I think I've failed you boys(me an my brother).

I remember telling her not to think too much about it but what frightens me to be honest is that I remember echoing her thoughts as well.

I later changed my mind about it and decided it was all my fault. That make everything better I guess.

hmm this is getting long.

I should cut it off here before it becomes a mini-blog post.

Maybe it already is. ... |||-u-

7:23 AM  
Anonymous kennhyn said...

momment that past, can never be lifted back. Just cherish the future together.

But to write a 2 min speech is not easy. I'll basically start with a simple mocking of my mum, to make the crowd smile, then come the touching message. I'll keep it short and give a hug to her, if she on stage, then continue with thanks. And before the crowd cry, I make them laugh again.....

My mum is already in my hall of fame! :) All the best!

12:14 PM  
Blogger Vernon said...

Congrats to your mom!!!!

Mom's are the pillars of every man and woman on the planet!

5:19 PM  
Blogger Speaker said...

For me, Thank You is more powerful than I love you. Mother has done so much for me and the 'thank you' that i said to her is just count-able.

10:08 PM  
Blogger 95% Trainings said...

Thanks guys! Appreciate your sharing.

10:46 AM  

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